What Would You Like To Be Known/remembered For?

I've been struggling with this question recently.

My health is failing, and as I struggle against that I realized that my entire life had been devoted to taking care of others, and I personally haven't done or accomplished much of anything. There's only a handful of people in my life, and mostly just in passing. I haven't had any impact. That makes me a little sad. But, I'm not dead yet, and there's still time.

That make me think. Do other people ever feel like that? And what would you like your "legacy" to be? I'm so curious, so please don't just lurk, I really want to know.

I'd LIKE to be remembered as helper. Someone who people think of fondly that was always ready to help when it mattered and added value and irreverence (unhinged hot takes and one liners) to their lives.

How about you?

 

See, I disagree here. Years ago, back when I was an angsty teenager, I really struggled with depression and suicidal ideas. Sometimes I still do. But I've learned how to deal with it, in part thanks to advice given here, by you and others. So, thanks, and don't sell yourself short.

I don't hold the illusion or wish of being remembered by anyone other than my wife (who will outlive me) and my children. The only thing I do hope to accomplish is to make my part of the world a better, safer, happier place while I can and while I'm gone. Whether people know I (re)designed their neighbourhoods I couldn't care less about.

 

Thank you. I hope your struggles feel controllable, these days. I still feel that way, more than is strictly necessary, and it's hard. It feels so lonely and I try to keep busy, but it never goes all the way away. I'm always looking for new things, and new friends that will help ease the feeling and fill the void. One day I hope to be successful.

I like your hopes. They're perfect.

 

Oddly I have been thinking a bit on this lately. Unfortunately I went to 3 funerals over the last year. Well, one was just an impromptu memorial.

one literally was standing room only. The other 2 I was surprised at the number of people who came, and the stories that that they shared about the deceased.

one guy was a preacher, so he had 4 people preach at his service, my aunt had 3 preachers.

Certainly makes you think.

 

My plan for my memorial is to be cremated, (I am trying to find someone willing to fill my pockets with firecrackers first) and then buried beneath the roots of an apple tree, so I can become one with the tree. My plaque will say "1980-20xx Probably pet something she shouldn't have. Behold the next evolution: An apple tree. So b*tches can eat me." Although probably just the dates and that last part...

 

Thanks, right back at you. I have noticed my thoughts get more intrusive when I remain physically inactive for a longer period of time. So I try to stay occupied with keeping the garden decent, going on walks even in bad weather etc. Perhaps it helps for you too. But for me at least, same as what you're saying. The thoughts never really go away.

 

I have a list. When I croak I expect someone to contact Zak Bagans and tell him I fully intend to prove the afterlife exists and convince him to come to my house so I can throw a brick at him. (That's how he got famous in the first place)

 

I have a rather long list.

 

anti war activist i guess

 

what are you ill from if i may ask otherwise dont say

 

Just degenerative nonsense. It's not sufficiently diagnosed yet, to tell you the proper name. The way healthcare works around here is you have to find a problem, and then have like 40 conversations with different specialists to find out which problem it is, specifically.

They have to check the entire left hip/leg/foot too, do some blood work, probably more imaging. Currently all that's known for certain is Disc desiccation at L4-5 and L5-S1, Trace degenerative retrolisthesis L5 over S1 Moderate facet arthrosis bilaterally at L2-3 through L5-S1. That's a lot of fancy words that mean arthritis and one kinda bad joint, so the lumbar portion of my back is all trash. More testing imminent.

 

Crikey Wenchie that is not too good. Sorry to hear this as I know first hand that back problems can be very testing. In my late teens I used to do judo and the instructor was using me to demonstrate a new throw for the group and I landed with the small of my back half on and half off the 3" high mat. It ruptured a couple of discs and cracked a vertebra. This took about 5 years of treatment to fix and ever since I have to be really careful lifting things.
With my SLE and other issues I get quite a bit of joint pain very similar to arthritis and so I take Mobic which is an anti inflammatory that reduces joint pain and this helps keep me mobile. Mobic might help you so maybe have a chat to your doctor as Mobic made a big difference for me.
Good luck and sending good wishes

 

I was a little bummed that it will never get better. I was hoping with PT and maybe some meds I could feel better, but I guess the long-term prognosis is it's only going to get worse, so that was a bummer.

But it is what it is. Throw it on the pile. I tend to set piles on fire and roast marshmallows on them, so I'm not going to worry about it and just make sure I'm living my best life anyway.

 

Sorry to hear about you folks back problems. So far, mine is responding more or less with chiropractic care. And some OTC pain stuff on certain days. And I LOVE my heating pad! Got the giant heating pad that is like almost 2' x 3'...

 

I need one of those. Just bed sized. I guess I got so weak that my PT has to heat me when I arrive and ice me when I leave because my muscles get real tight/angry later that night/the next day, but I'm doing my best! Found out for sure I'm arthritic in every joint of my lumbar, and part of my sacral, with a bad disc at L4-L5 but I can still do what I can to make my other muscles stronger to take pressure off it.